Soul Chocolate

giving chocolate to others is an intimate form of communication, a sharing of deep, dark secrets…

another cry November 28, 2012

Filed under: milk chocolate — beautynobility @ 8:26 am

does a song ever epitomize your feeling at a precise moment? that’s what this song, need you now, by plumb does. 

i’m still working through everything i’m thinking, feeling, praying, but i do know this: at a moment when where i should perhaps be feeling greatest joy, i’m crying. God. I need You now. 




when i grow up… [30 before 30] November 22, 2012

Filed under: milk chocolate — beautynobility @ 12:25 pm

“i wanna be famous, i wanna be a star, i wanna have groupies.”


quite a few of my friends have had birthdays in the past month, and two in particular have told me about a practice they have of creating goals/new things for their next year that correspond withe age they’re turning. this may be a common thing; i just know that i haven’t heard of it/done it. i generally do a review of the past year and think about what i’ve learned (i.e. 26 lessons), but they got me thinking.

so, i thought, why not take it a step further? instead of just 29 bright ideas, let’s go with 30 before 30: 30 {new} things i plan to do in the year before i turn 30.

because i know it’ll be hard for me. and because i post sporadically. and because i still plan to do (and publish*) 28 reasons [things learned at 28], i’m going to do my 30 before 30 sllooooowly. beginning now.

1. run a 5k. i know, i know. 5ks are sooo passe, get on the 1/2 marathon level, Cha! but, um, i hate to exercise. and i get tired. and this is all about baby steps, okay! i want to go into 30 knowing i conquered one of my big things. who knows, maybe i’ll become an exercise maven and be all, “when i’m 30 i’m running a half marathon!” okay, we can all stop laughing now.

more to come. any ideas for the new things i should do? help! i need 29 more!


when opposites attack [happy (US) thanksgiving]

Filed under: milk chocolate — beautynobility @ 7:46 am

i think, having lived in the US for so long, i still operate in some ways more on an American timetable than Canadian. so today, more than October 8, i find myself reflecting on thankfulness, gratitude, and what God has done for me.

as i was driving into work today, and listening to sermons on the radio, i thought about how negative my thoughts normally are. and what it would look like if i went to the opposites. if i let the opposites in my life attack the fear with faith.

not dating/no relationships –> more friends than i can count. real friends.

living at home –> i have a home.

took a job i shouldn’t have –> i have a job. and God is showing me ways out.

lived in fear for several months –> God showed me. now i have the opportunity to walk in faith.

i have the most unhealthy view of myself and my body. –> i am fearfully and wonderfully made. God is using the people and things in my life to bring me healthy perspective and healthy behaviours.

eeek! what am i doing with my life?!? –> i have degrees. graduated well. speaker, accolades, awards. all from the grace and endowment of God.

i have no network in Toronto. stupid choice to go to school in CA. –> every time i walk into a courthouse, i build a network. legit, i meet someone new EVERY single time who seems excited to meet me.

i miss my friends. –> again, i have friends. a lot of them. who care for me, about me, pray for me.

i have so much sin. so much. –> God’s grace is so much greater. the Cross is so much stronger. the resurrection brings so much more deliverance.

as i allow my opposites to attack, i realize that focusing on me reduces thankfulness. focusing on God – the ultimate opposite to my fear, flesh – brings more than gratitude. it brings action. change. and a lifestyle of thankfulness that impacts others.

i am thankful. God gives faith to attack my fear.


back to school? November 13, 2012

Filed under: milk chocolate — beautynobility @ 10:16 am

so, i’m considering going back to school. i know, i’ve been out for all of 6 months (and really, only the past 3 should count, since i was studying for the bar for three months). and about 7 months ago, i told everyone in my life to smack me if i said i was going back.

but… i know how to do school. i know that i’m good at it. and someone, somewhere would take me. i could probably even talk someone into paying for it. probably.

and it would buy me at least a year to get a job i don’t totally despise. and possibly get me back into the US (if that’s what i ultimately decide to do).

eh. still thinking.

but what could it hurt to apply…right?


a day late, a vote made. do more. November 7, 2012

Filed under: milk chocolate — beautynobility @ 12:16 pm

one of my best friends in the world and my AMOH wrote this brilliant piece below. please, read the excerpt, then click the link and read the rest. i know, i know. the time for voting has passed. y’all did this yesterday (americans), and canadians… we do it when they tell us, LOL. but think. think about the immigrant – and not the “illegal.”* think about the child who depends on you. think about those who have committed a mistake, paid their due to society, but still cannot vote. or work. or do whatever else constitutes civic engagement beyond voting. do that. do more. do more for those who cannot. and consider: someone, somewhere may be doing more for you.

Today is November 6. Not a particularly special day. most regular in all respects but today in the united states of America, every 4 years on November 6, a president is elected. Voted into the highest seat in the land not by a secret selection or dynasty but by the people and hopefully for the people. It’s a unique and hard fought for privilege and process. But for some of us, its a day to sit on the side lines and watch. Why you ask, would I choose to sit on the side lines and watch a highly contentious election season come to an end without participating and voicing my opinion and exercising a right? well you see….I do not have that right, as I am not a US citizen.

read more here.

*i despise this term. no human, ever, is illegal. one may be an undocumented immigrant. but no one is illegal. let’s change our language and value each person as one formed in the image of God.