until. in between. in the meantime.
words we say when we’re in a holding pattern, just waiting, watching for the ‘better thing’ to arrive. “i’ll work on my piano until my friend comes.” “i’ll season chicken in between tv shows.”
words i found myself saying last week to a friend: i’ll find a career to do until i get married. i need something to do in the meantime.
it hit me: i’ve reached the point that i’ve always viewed with contempt in other women. you know the women. the ones who half-heartedly pursue a job/career, but don’t really go full tilt because they’re always sure that marriage is right around the corner. that their prince is almost here. so why jeopardize that amazing future with something as lame as the calling of God?
yeah. it is that harsh. because that’s what i heard from God: i was so busy living for man (literally, living for a man), that i neglected to truly seek His face about my calling.
this hit home as i began my devos this morning. psalm 95:6-7 says: “come let us worship and bow down, let us kneel before the Lord our God, our maker. For He is our God, and we are the people of His pasture, and the sheep of His hand.” fairly innocuous, simple praise to God, right? wrong…at least for me today. i realized that by, even subconsciously, living my life in a holding pattern, i am not worshipping God. i am acting like someone else’s person, i am being led as the sheep of someone else. and how, how could a just, righteous, jealous God be any less than pleased with that? how could a just, righteous, jealous God permit me to walk in any less than whole-hearted devotion to Him?
i have realized that the only “meantime” i need to live in, is ‘until Christ returns.’ until i am caught up to glory to be with Him. until i can truly see Jesus face to face. He is the only Man i will wait on, the only One for whom i will live my life in joyful anticipation.
may i, may you, stop living in the meantime, and live in the now. for this is the day that the Lord has made. rejoice! be glad! be led like His sheep, and your boundaries will be in pleasant places, your grass green, your table spread. rejoice, for He has given a glorious day!